Embracing Yourself: Overcoming Low Self-Esteem with Mindfulness and Compassion

I know what it’s like to feel like you’re just not enough. It’s like there’s this constant voice in your head, whispering doubts, magnifying your flaws, and reminding you of every mistake you’ve ever made. Maybe that voice is louder than you’d like it to be. Low self-esteem isn’t a life sentence. You can shift it. You can heal. It takes time, patience, and most importantly compassion.

This is an invitation to slow down, tune in, and start treating yourself with the same care you’d offer to a dear friend. Because, at the end of the day, that’s the foundation of self-esteem: the relationship you have with yourself.

1. Recognize the Stories You Tell Yourself

One of the first steps to shifting low self-esteem is becoming aware of the stories you’ve been telling yourself. These stories often take root early on—through childhood experiences, relationships, or societal pressures. For me, the narrative was clear: I wasn’t enough. Not smart enough. Not pretty enough. Not successful enough. It wasn’t until I really started to pause and listen to that inner monologue that I realized how often I was reinforcing these beliefs without even questioning them.

So, start by getting curious about your inner dialogue. What do you say to yourself when you look in the mirror? When you make a mistake? When you’re about to try something new? Notice the tone of your thoughts. Are they kind and supportive, or critical and harsh? Notice what happens in your body. Is there tension? Bracing? Or a sense of numbness or disconnection?

Mindful Practice: Try to sit with your thoughts for as long as feels manageable. When a self-critical thought arises, simply observe it without judgment. Ask yourself, “Is this true? Is this thought helpful?” Over time, you’ll begin to notice patterns, and you can start to challenge those negative beliefs.

2. Shift Your Focus to the Present Moment

Low self-esteem often lives in the past or the future. You may be ruminating on past failures or worrying about how you’ll be perceived in the future. Both of these mental states are traps that pull you away from the present moment, where true healing happens.

Mindfulness teaches us to return to the here and now. It’s about being fully present in whatever you’re doing, whether it’s taking a walk, eating a meal, or just breathing. When you bring your attention to the present moment, you free yourself from the weight of past regrets and future anxieties. In that space, you can start to reconnect with yourself in a more authentic way.

Mindful Practice: Take a few moments each day to ground yourself in the present. Place your hands on your heart or belly and focus on your breath. Soften your tongue to the floor of your mouth, soften your shoulders, belly, and pelvic floor. If your mind starts to wander, gently bring it back to the feeling of the air entering and leaving your body. This simple practice helps anchor you in the here and now, where you are enough just as you are.

3. Cultivate Self-Compassion

We can be our own harshest critics, but imagine if we treated ourselves with the same care and understanding that we would a close friend who was struggling. What if, instead of beating ourselves up for every imperfection, we offered ourselves compassion, kindness, and a little grace?

Self-compassion is a key practice for building self-esteem. It involves treating yourself with love and understanding, especially during times of difficulty. It’s about recognizing that being human means making mistakes, experiencing setbacks, and sometimes falling short. And that’s okay. You’re still worthy of love and respect, just as you are.

Mindful Practice: The next time you make a mistake or feel like you're not measuring up, try to speak to yourself the way you would speak to a friend. You might say, “It’s okay, you’re doing your best,” or “This is just a moment, not the definition of who you are.” Allow yourself to feel the warmth of those words, and remind yourself that you are deserving of compassion—especially from yourself.

4. Challenge Perfectionism and Embrace Your Imperfections

The truth is, perfectionism is a cage. It keeps you trapped in a cycle of inadequacy because there’s always something more to achieve, more to fix. And every time you fall short of that unrealistic standard, it reinforces the belief that you're not good enough.

Instead of trying to be perfect, why not embrace your imperfections? They are part of what makes you uniquely human. When you let go of the need to be flawless, you give yourself permission to be fully yourself, with all your quirks, mistakes, and growth.

Mindful Practice: Each day, try to celebrate a small imperfection—whether it’s a messy hair day, a failed attempt at something new, or an emotional reaction you had that felt “imperfect.” These are the moments that make you real. Notice how your body feels when you let go of the need to be perfect. It might feel like a release—a lightness, even.

5. Nourish Your Body and Soul

Low self-esteem can often be linked to neglecting our physical, emotional, or spiritual well-being. When we don’t take care of ourselves, it’s harder to feel good about who we are. Taking the time to nourish your body, mind, and spirit can be incredibly healing.

This doesn’t mean you have to engage in some big, transformative ritual every day (though if you love that, go for it!). It’s more about checking in with your needs and honoring them—whether it’s eating nourishing food, getting enough sleep, moving your body in ways that feel good, or doing something creative or spiritual that lights you up.

Mindful Practice: Take a moment to check in with yourself. How is your body feeling today? Do you need rest? Do you need to stretch or move? Is there something your soul is craving, like time in nature or a warm cup of tea with a good book? Taking small, mindful actions to care for your body and soul reinforces your inherent worth and strengthens your self-esteem.

6. Surround Yourself with Support

The people we surround ourselves with can either lift us up or drain us. If you’re struggling with low self-esteem, it’s crucial to cultivate relationships that are positive, uplifting, and supportive. This doesn’t mean you need to cut ties with everyone who doesn’t affirm you but it perhaps means prioritizing relationships that make you feel seen, valued, and loved.

Be intentional about seeking out people who inspire you, encourage you, and remind you of your worth. Whether it’s a close friend, a mentor, or even a therapist, having someone who can reflect your strengths back to you is a powerful way to reinforce your self-esteem.

Mindful Practice: Take a moment to reflect on the people in your life. Do they uplift you, or do they leave you feeling drained and unsupported? Consider reaching out to someone who you feel comfortable with, who can listen to you without judgment. Just sharing your feelings with someone who cares can be a powerful act of self-compassion.

Overcoming low self-esteem is a journey a slow, sometimes messy, but deeply rewarding process. It’s not about fixing yourself or becoming someone else; it’s about peeling back the layers of conditioning and returning to the truth of who you are. You are already whole, already enough.

So, be gentle with yourself. Take things one step at a time. We all deserve to feel good about ourselves, and with the right tools, awareness, and regulated nervous system, it’s entirely possible to rebuild that sense of self-worth slowly, mindfully, and with compassion.

About Rooted Healing
At Rooted Healing, we specialize in trauma-informed care that goes beyond traditionl talk therapy. We utilize holistic approaches such as EMDR and Somatic Experiencing. If you’re looking to heal from past trauma, anxiety, PTSD, or other emotional challenges, we’re here to help you on your journey. Contact us today by clicking here to learn more about how these modalities can help you reclaim your life.